Living in harmony

“One soul within two bodies:
That’s exactly the meaning of harmony. It is the most exquisite experience.

Ordinarily we are living in conflict, in disharmony. Parents are feeling a generation gap between themselves and their own children. There seems to be no common ground of understanding; harmony is a faraway goal. They don’t even understand each other’s language — not that they speak different languages, but their visions are different, their attitudes are different, their approach towards life is different — and there seems to be no way to come to any conclusion. Parents and children are no more on speaking terms because each time they speak it turns out to be a fight.

The same thing happens with husbands and wives. The husband is living in disharmony with the wife — they call it living together. But unless this oneness arises, their togetherness is nothing but an underground conflict, erupting at any moment for any meaningless, silly reason. Both are sitting on volcanoes.

Slowly slowly, things get cooler: no more pillow fights, no more breaking of cups and glasses and saucers. But that does not mean that they have come to a harmony. That simply means they have understood the stupidity of it all; it is better to be silent. The husband simply goes on reading the same newspaper. On Sunday it is a little difficult; they avoid each other, they don’t want to be left alone together.

I am reminded of a strange book in Sanskrit. It’s name is BHAMITI. It is a strange name because it is a commentary on one of the most philosophical treatises ever written, the BRAHMASUTRAS of Badarayan. Badarayan is perhaps the greatest philosopher the world has produced, and he has written these small maxims, BRAHMASUTRAS, maxims about the ultimate.

There is no other book in the whole world on which so many commentaries have been written — thousands and thousands of commentaries, because the maxims are so small, so condensed that unless somebody opens them, explains them, interprets them, you will not be able to find their meaning. BRAHMASUTRA is a strange book. No other book has the same fate as Badarayan’s BRAHMASUTRA. Commentaries were written, but the commentaries were also very difficult to understand, so commentaries upon commentaries were written. But still these were not so simple either, so commentaries on those commentaries…. This is the only book in which you will find a series of commentaries; the original is lost. And for thousands of years in India, people have been writing commentaries on the commentaries to bring its meaning to the masses.

One of the commentaries, one of the best commentaries on the BRAHMASUTRAS, is BHAMITI, and it is strange, because Bhamiti is a weird name for a commentary. `Bhamiti’ is the name of a certain woman, and to give that name to the commentary….The commentary was written by a great philosopher, Vachaspati, whose wife’s name was Bhamiti. It took him twelve years to write the commentary, and he decided that the day the commentary was complete, he would renounce the world and go to the Himalayas.

One day, in the middle of the night, the commentary was completed. He took the candle, in whose light he had been writing the commentary, to go to his room. And on the way there, he found a woman and he asked, “Who are you and what are you doing here?”

She said, “My lord, you were so much immersed in writing the commentary, you forgot completely that you had married me. I am your wife.”

Vachaspati said, “I remember. And I also remember that every day… just show me your hand, because I can recognize your hand. You were the one who was putting the candle by my side every day as the sun was setting. I know this hand. But it is too late; I have decided that the day the commentary is complete I will leave the house. You should have reminded me.”

Bhamiti said, “It would have been very unloving to disturb you; I was waiting. And don’t be worried — if you have decided to leave, you leave without any worry. I will not come as a hindrance to your decision. It is enough that I can see that you are worried for me. This will be enough for my whole life, that you had a certain love.”

Vachaspati said, “You are a great woman. It is very rare to find such a woman. It is easy to find many commentators of my quality, but to find a woman of your quality — such love, such trust, such waiting, such patience. And such greatness of heart — just your concern that it is getting late is enough for you — as if there is no expectation. I will call my commentary BHAMITI, so that whoever reads this commentary is bound to be surprised by the name” — because it has no relevance; the commentary is on the BRAHMASUTRAS…. And, Bhamiti?

“But without you, and without your love, and without your patience, and without your silent waiting…. You never came in front of me, and you are so beautiful that it is certain: if you had come in front of me, it would have been a disturbance. I may have forgotten about the commentary; I may have delayed in completing it just to remain with you.”

But Bhamiti said, “I have received more than I deserve. You should not wait in the house any longer. Let me have the pride of having a husband who followed his decision… even though now I can see you are hesitating. Don’t hesitate. I will not allow you to remain in the house; you have to go to the Himalayas — because if you remain in the house, I will not be able to give you the same respect.”

This is a tremendous, unbelievable story.

Vachaspati left for the Himalayas, but he could not forget Bhamiti… such a quality, such grace and such beauty… something beyond human qualities. Only such people have given proof that there is something more than human qualities, something which can only be called divine.

Vachaspati remains a great scholar, but Bhamiti proves to be a far more divine personality.

So once in a while there have been, in other relationships, people who have felt harmony with each other, but that is extremely rare — accidental and exceptional.

A musical oneness… such a deep love that it consumes your ego. There are not two persons in relationship but only a harmonious whole, an energy field. The secret is: how not to be, how to disappear as an ego. Then whatever you touch creates music, whatever you touch becomes gold.

Osho: Beyond Enlightenment Chapter #11 Chapter title: Harmony… The birthplace of love Q 3.

कश्तियाँ मज़बूत सब बह जाएँगी सैलाब में
काग़ज़ी इक नाव मेरी ज़ात की रह जाएगी ख़ालिद सुहैल

kashtiyāñ mazbūt sab bah jā.eñgī sailāb meñ
kāġhzī ik naav merī zaat kī rah jā.egī KHALID SUHAIL

All stronger boats will flow away in the deluge
one paper boat of mine will survive.

Reminded of this melodious song from the film “Sangam” (1964) Lyrics by Shailendra sung by Lata Mangeshkar and Mukesh

11 thoughts on “Living in harmony”

  1. Absolutely profound thoughts. Rajiv Bhai I am looking forward to the day when u would release your first publication. Stay blessed, smile and make others smile

  2. Unique write up. Rare subject in these days. Away from the stereotype of sacrifice and towards how to retain respect.

  3. Rajendra Dhandhukia

    Beautifully written. One read does not give satisfaction. It’s absorbing and unbelievable. Mind stops and experiences the feeling of completeness. Great read…

    1. Dard jab dil mein ho to dawa keejiye,
      Dil hi jab dard mein ho to kya keejiye
      – Mirza Ghalib

      Bhai, likhte raho, Bhamiti bhi es jeevan ki sachchai hai

  4. Very nice story. There are people who have to express their love in words and there are people who have strong love that needs no words.

    The mode of expression depends on both the lover and the loved. What is good for one may not be very good for the other. So we have to find our own avenues.

    I will love to read Bhamiti some day.

  5. Great share Rajivbhai, ek dil ke do armaan hai hum. This is indeed a balm to matrimonial relationships and beyond. Continue enlightening us with your writing.

  6. My good lord! This is one of the deepest things I have read for a long long time. Exceptional. It will remain with me forever.

    Thanks, dearest Rajiv. May you keep spreading light and delight.

    With loads of love,



    The analogy of Sangam Song is so apt… lyrically sums up the entire write up. So when I’ll listen this song this article will pop up right in front of my eyes, while if read it, it’s the song that’s playing in the background.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *