Shahbuddin Rathod is a renowned Humorist, Writer of Gujarati Literature, Teacher and School Principal. His humor is loaded with sharp observations of human behavior and human psychology. While he will make you roll on the floor laughing, he will also make you think and introspect.
Shahbuddin bhai once said, “If we observe people who smoke beedis — (A beedi is like a thin cigarette filled with tobacco flakes and commonly wrapped in a Tendu leaf tied with a string or adhesive at one end. A traditional method of tobacco use throughout South Asia and parts of the Middle East. Today beedis are popular and inexpensive in India, where beedi consumption outpaces that of conventional cigarettes.) — there are two types of people when you observe those who smoke beedis.
One type are those who would choose beedis that have become loose, the knot of the string has come out, the tendu leaf is partially open and the tobacco flakes are coming out of that beedi — they will identify such a beedi from the stack and smoke it. When they look for the next beedi, they will once again look for the most loosely tied beedi and so on till they finish the packet.
The other type of people are those who will tap the pack of beedis with their index finger. That thud will pop-up the best and strong beedi up from the stack. He would pick that beedi and smoke. The next one also will be identified with the thud and the strong one will pop up and so on.
Thus, even from the same pack of beedis, the first guy will look for and choose the weakest beedi and hence he will always smoke poor quality of weak beedis. The other guy who is looking for the strongest and the best beedis, will eventually smoke all good beedis.
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I was rearranging my personal library when I picked up Ken Blanchard’s book WHALE DONE — The Power of Positive Relationships. As I started re-reading it, I could relate the discussion with my own team at the office as well as at home.
Author talks about reviewing the two responses:
1. Catching people doing things wrong — GOTcha
2. Catching people doing things right — Whale Done
“If you grew up being GOTcha’d a lot, maybe you’ve tended to perpetuate it with others. But if your goal as a manager is performance improvement, it’s vitally important you start using the WHALE DONE Response. I think you can begin to see that a lot of us often do things exactly backwards. We focus our attention on poor performance rather than good performance. In the process, we reinforce the very behavior we don’t want!
Attention is like sunshine to humans. What we give our attention to, grows. What we ignore, withers. I realize that switching your attention is not easy, particularly if you’ve gotten into GOTcha habit — finding fault and criticizing others. You need a way to remind yourself to give people lots of WHALE DONEs. Just imagine, when you are with your people or your families, that every person is wearing a big sign that says, CATCH ME DOING SOMETHING RIGHT.”
Sometimes, of course, you’re going to forget and react negatively. You’ll have a bad day, come home, and fly off the handle on someone. But if you make a conscious effort to emphasize the positive in all your relationships, eventually it will become a habit. And it’s going to pay off in ways you can’t imagine.
I was standing in line at an airport check-in counter recently, and the guy ahead of me began giving the attendant all kinds of abuse. He complained about his reservations, shouted about the delay, and criticized the airline for inefficiency. He was openly sarcastic and rude. Finally as the attendant directed him to his gate and he walked away, it was my turn. I stepped up and said to her, “That was great the way you handled that guy. I was amazed that you managed to stay so calm and composed!”
“Thanks,” she said. I appreciate the compliment. Then she proceeded to upgrade me to first class.
When you accentuate the positive, you’ll begin to pay attention to what you do or say after people perform. I guarantee their performance will improve, and so will your relationships.”
It all depends on How You Choose your Beedi.
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कोई मिल जाए तुम जैसा…….ये नामुमकिन है
पर तुम ढूंड लो हम जैसा… इतना आसान ये भी नहीं….।
Koi mil jaye tum jaisa…ye namumkin hai,
Par tum dhundh lo hum jaisa…itna aasan ye bhi nahin.
It’s impossible to find someone like you,
But to find someone like me…is equally difficult.