Find Your Bride.

A new shop had opened in the town, where any young man could go and select a suitable bride for himself. The sign board on the shop read “Find Your Bride”.

One youngster went into the shop. As he opened the main door, he thought he would see some potential brides there. Rather he found two doors inside. On one of the doors it was written “Young Bride” and on the other it was written “Not-so-Young Bride”. The man instinctively pushed the first door and went inside. He was obviously hoping to find a young lady there but he again found two doors.

On one it was written “Beautiful Bride” and on the other it read “Ordinary Bride”. Naturally, the man again got into the first door. There was neither a beautiful nor ordinary looking lady….but in front there were two more doors.

On one door it was written “Good Cook” and on the other door it was written “Never Cooked”. The young man was very calculative and smart, he again selected the first door. It is natural, you too would have done the same.

He was again faced with two doors. “A Good Singer” and “Not-so-good Singer”. He entered into the first door as expected. Again there were two more doors. One the first it was written “With Dowry” and the other one was “Without Dowry”. As expected he again selected the first door. He was smart, calculative and behaved quite sensibly. It went on for a while until he opened another door…

But this time there were no two doors. It was just a room with nothing but a mirror which had the inscirption, “Your greed and expectations are growing about your life partner; it’s time now that you should look into the mirror.”

This is our life too! Desires….desires….and more desires. To keep on moving from one door to the other forgetting to see our own face, our own being.

The desire will drop off the person who would see one’s face. The one who went blindly behind desires has forgotten his own face. One desire leads to another…every door led to two new doors. Life remains empty. There is “Hope” written on every door, through which there are more doors ahead. And on every door you feel like trying a little more, there is more behind this door. Becoming hopeful, you see the dream which is never fulfilled.

Now the time has come. You too should see your face in the mirror. Recognize yourself. The person who recognizes oneself would never expect anything from the world as here there’s nothing worth asking for. The person who identifies himself would get everything that he asked for or didn’t ask for; and the one who goes on asking, never gets anything.
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A CERTAIN MAN DECIDED THAT HE WOULD SEEK THE PERFECT MASTER. HE READ MANY BOOKS, VISITED SAGE AFTER SAGE, LISTENED, DISCUSSED AND PRACTISED, BUT HE ALWAYS FOUND HIMSELF DOUBTING OR UNSURE.

AFTER TWENTY YEARS HE MET A MAN WHOSE EVERY WORD AND ACTION CORRESPONDED WITH HIS IDEA OF THE TOTALLY REALIZED MAN.

THE TRAVELER LOST NO TIME. ”YOU,” HE SAID, ”SEEM TO ME TO BE THE PERFECT MASTER. IF YOU ARE, MY JOURNEY IS AT AN END.”

”I AM, INDEED, DESCRIBED BY THAT NAME,” SAID THE MASTER.
”THEN, I BEG OF YOU, ACCEPT ME AS A DISCIPLE.” SAID THE TRAVELER.

”THAT,” SAID THE MASTER, ”I CANNOT DO FOR WHILE YOU MAY DESIRE THE PERFECT MASTER, HE, IN TURN, REQUIRES ONLY THE PERFECT PUPIL.”

The Master appears only when the disciple is ready. Never otherwise. In no other way. The disciple has to be ready and ripe; only at that moment does the Master become visible. The disciple has to earn eyes, to earn ears, to create a heart, to feel. How can the sun appear if you are blind? The sun may appear but you will go on missing it.

Unless you have eyes, there is no beauty in the world. The flowers will bloom, but not for you. And stars will fill the sky with immense beauty, but not for you. Unless you have eyes, there is no beauty in the world.

If you don’t have love in the heart, you will not find the beloved. The basic requirement has to be fulfilled. Only love finds the beloved. Eyes find beauty. And the ears find music and melodies.

But there are people, and they are many – the majority consists of those – who go on searching and seeking something out there without creating a corresponding receptivity in themselves. I have come across many seekers who are searching for a Master – not at all aware that the disciple is completely absent. The disciple is not there at all. How can you find a Master?

The Master is not just an objective phenomenon THERE. First he has to be something interior in you. That’s what disciple hood is: a preparation, a thirst, a passionate desire, a great passion for truth. That is lacking. And then people go on searching. And if they don’t find, it is not surprising. They are not going to find! They may come across MANY Masters, but they will go on missing.

How can you see the Master if you are not vulnerable to him? How can you see the Master if you don’t know even what it is to be a disciple? The beginning of the finding of a Master starts by being a disciple. The real seeker does not worry about the Master, where he is. His whole concern is how to create the disciple in himself, how to be a learner, open to reality; how to function from innocence, and how not to function from the state of knowledge.

To find a Master you have to be a child. To find a Master you have to be utterly innocent, not knowing anything, the mind empty– full of passion for truth, but without any conclusions about it. This is the state of real learning. And then you need not even go anywhere: the Master will come to you.

The Master appears in strange ways sometimes, but it always happens. Whenever someone is ripe, God starts coming in many forms to him. The Master is the last form of God that comes to the disciple. After the Master there is formlessness. He is the LAST experience of form; Beyond him there is formlessness– then there is God with no form.

The Master is the last who looks like you, who lives like you, whom you can touch, with whom you can have a dialogue, who speaks like you. Beyond the Master is silence – utter, absolute, virgin. Beyond the Master is bodilessness. The Master is just exactly in between the world and God.

If you are really tired of the world and the rut and the routine of it, don’t start searching for a Master – rather, search how to become a disciple. Start unburdening yourself from prejudices, dogmas. Forget all that you know….

Ramana Maharshi used to say to his disciples: If you want to be with me you will have to unlearn. If you don’t unlearn, then I have nothing to give you. You are already too full.

A CERTAIN MAN DECIDED THAT HE WOULD SEEK THE PERFECT MASTER.

And why the Perfect Master? The ego always seeks perfection. If you are after money, the ego wants you to be the richest man in the world, the most perfect man in the world. If you are after morality, you want to become the most perfect saint. The ego has a very very deep desire to be perfect. All egoists are perfectionists, and all perfectionists are neurotic. The idea of perfection drives people mad.

A humble person know imperfections, and a humble person accepts his imperfections. And a humble person does not ask for the impossible. It is the ego that always asks for the impossible and fails. And feels frustrated, betrayed, cheated. But again it starts asking the same thing.

Why do you need a Perfect Master? You have taken one thing for granted: that you are such a great man that less than that will not be worth your while, will not be satisfying; less than that will be below you. You are such a perfect man, you need a Perfect Master. Ordinary Masters won’t do – something extraordinary it has to be. You can only be interested in the extraordinary.

And the paradox is that the extraordinary exists in a very ordinary way. The extraordinary never exists as the extraordinary, because all those pretensions of being extraordinary are foolish and stupid.

A real man, an authentic man, has no idea of being superior in any way to anybody else. He lives in a world where comparison does not exist. Now, the very idea of seeking a Perfect Master is based in comparison.

If you start thinking of finding a Perfect Master, you will go into books to know who is a Perfect Master. Now, books will confuse you, because every book will tell a different story. If you read a Jain book, it simply describes Mahavir, and says these are the characteristics of a Perfect Master. They are not! They are the characteristics of a particular Perfect Master, Mahavir.

If you read a Buddhist book, they also describe the characteristics of a Perfect Master– they are not either, but only those of one manifestation of the Perfect Master, Buddha. And so on and so forth. People go on thinking that Masters used to happen only in the past, now they don’t happen, now they are no more there. And the same was the case in Buddha’s time. There are stories: people would come and ask Buddha, ”Are you the Perfect Master?” There were people who would go to Jesus and would ask, ”Are you the Messiah we were waiting for?”

The Messiah is THERE standing in front of their eyes, in front of them, and they are asking, ”Are you the Messiah?” If he says no, they will be happy. If he says yes, they will be offended.

YOU CAN READ, YOU CAN ARGUE, you can become very logical about it, but nothing is going to help, the doubt WILL persist – unless you experience. Only experience kills doubt. But how to experience a Master? You have to be a disciple first; you have to fulfill that requirement. And what is the requirement of a disciple?

Prayerfulness is the requirement of disciple hood . Capacity to wait. Capacity to be empty. Capacity to surrender. Capacity to be available. That’s what prayer is! And if you know how to pray, you will know all that is needed to know. Not only will you come across a Perfect Master– you are going to come across God himself.

Osho: The Perfect Master, Vol 1: CHAPTER 1. WHEN THE DISCIPLE IS READY (Excerpts)

HAPPY GURU PURNIMA !!! (on 24th July 2021)

हज़ारों ख़्वाहिशें ऐसी कि हर ख़्वाहिश पे दम निकले
बहुत निकले मिरे अरमान लेकिन फिर भी कम निकले
…………….मिर्ज़ा ग़ालिब

hazaaro.n KHvaahishe.n aisii ki har KHvaahish pe dam nikle
bahut nikle mire armaan lekin phir bhii kam nikle
……………………….MIRZA GHALIB

There are thousands of desires and each one is deadly
I kept yearning for ever without any fulfilment.

…and there is a similar “Husband Store” also there somewhere. Have a look!

I love this soulful song for the beloved by Mukesh from the film “Himalay ki god mein” (1965)

(240) Chand Si Mehbooba | Himalay Ki God Mein (1965) | Manoj Kumar | Mala Sinha | Evergreen Mukesh Song – YouTube

5 thoughts on “Find Your Bride.”

  1. Archita Trivedi

    In Sanskrit, it is “અથાતો બહ્મ જિગ્નાસા” one can not find a perfect master unless one is ripe and eager to learn.
    As usual nicely explained with different facets. Keep it up👍🏽

  2. Shabeen Narang

    Great story (as usual) and loved the one about the perfect master – perfect pupil. Good material to chew on for Sunday

  3. Wonderful narration of self realisation if put into practice..
    As always you have excelled in storytelling!
    Very powerful depiction of perfect master/ perfect pupil theory..

  4. Wonderful read, as always
    Perfect master, perfect self is not needed, accept where one is, start building from where one is….amazing

  5. Rajiv bhai. Excellent post. You are showing a mirror to us.

    People ask for the sky without realising if one is worth it as well. Love you!

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